Toulosing the will to live…
There’s nothing more likely to bring out the child in me than a Liverpool match on a workday afternoon. The furtive sneaking from the office, the joy of the illicit pint, it takes me right back to wagging double maths on a Monday morning, although I was a vodka drinker back then…
So yesterday afternoon I settled down in the local ready to watch what may be the most important tie of the year for Liverpool FC, or at least their accountants. As the media remind us ad nauseum, failure to qualify for the league stages would have disastrous consequences for the balance sheet, not to mention the humiliation of missing the business end of the European season. So plenty at stake, an attacking lineup with Gerrard in his favoured position and even some unseasonal summer weather, sunshine no less, to savour, at least on the telly. What more could one ask for?
Well, something approaching a football match would’ve been nice. Despite their scary sounding name Toulose were a poor side. Overly defensive considering the prize on offer they struggled to mount one shot on target in a first half controlled by Liverpool. The tedium was already mounting when Rick Parfitt got onto a Crouch header and unleashed a wonderful strike into the top corner.
To be fair, the French side had a bit more of the play after the break. Elmander had a couple of half chances and will need careful supervision at Anfield but the rest of the game passed in much the same vein as the first half. Even as a fan I found myself looking at my watch with the kind of angry expression more akin to the Old Trafford moaner in chief.
I didn’t need to stick around for the post match interviews to know that Rafa would be happy to have ‘controlled the game’. I’m also not one to prize an adventurous loss over a boring win. If the end of the season sees us celebrating in Moscow I’d happily play the same match another 14 times, but next time I play truant I hope to see a better game than that one.