Unbiased Report of 2006 … (Part Two)
Third place and more Cup Success - May 06
Two wins against Villa and Portmouth weren’t enough to leapfrog the Mancs into second place, but, like the year before, the games were a secondary attraction as fans made plans and talked about the Cup final ahead.
We all know what happened in Cardiff that day, and what a day it was. I never thought I’d see a better final than the Michael Owen one in 2001, yet that was bettered days later with the amazing 5-4 victory in Dortmund days later. That was then topped four years later in Istanbul, and whilst this one never reached those heights (What would?) it shows how lucky and spoilt we are to have witnessed and celebrated successes like these, and these are just in the last five years.
Dave Prentice told us that he wasn’t arsed because, in a woolly accent, he told us “You merderin Redshites aren’t even from Liverpool and we can get half season tickets.”
England World Cup Hopes Fade and Die (Again) - June 06
As England struggled against those renowned football nations such as Trinidad and Ecuador, twats who know fuck all and don’t bother with footy packed the pubs and screamed for England to win the World Cup. The joy of watching stupid fucking bints with red and white wigs and face paints crying as they went out was a joy to behold. Brian Woolnough blamed those dodgy foreign types who play in our country, especially the fucking Spanish cunts.
Pre-season - July 06
July brought about new signings in the shape of Fabio Aurelio, Mark Gonzalez, Craig Bellamy and Gabriel Paletta. After a seemingly endless pursuit of Daniel Alves, Jermaine Pennant was signed for the sum of a hefty £7m. After annual wins at Crewe and Wrexham, our performances in Switzerland and Germany were poor, a five nil reverse against Mainz alarming even for a pre-season game. Andy Gray was spotted partying like it was 1984 upon hearing the news of our five goal defeat.
Finally some proper footy - August 06
Another trip to Cardiff signalled the start of the new season, and as we outnumbered the Chelsea fans 1:3 off the pitch, on the pitch we beat them two to one, with Riise and Crouch scoring. Dirk Kuyt was signed through the next week from Feyernoord, with cynics around the World enquiring whether the Reds had only signed the Dutchman as a pretty boy to sell shirts to the Chinese market.
A 1-1 draw at the delightful Bramell Lane wasn’t an ideal way to start the season, but we followed it with another 1-1 draw against Maccabi Haifa in Kiev, ensuring our Champions League proper qualification. A two one victory over West Ham was a relief, although international football again made sure we’d only played twice in the league in the month of August.